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I need advice. For the nest four weeks, I am attending a parenting class in a friends home. Part of the class involves eating a meal and discussing parenting. Do you think it would be better to eat before the class or bring my own food?
My other problem involves a woman in one of my social groups. She just had interstim and has had her IC pain disappear. She is so excited that she tells me how great she feels every time I see her. I don't want to hurt her feelings but it is tough to hear about it each week. I am still in a lot of pain and know that Interstim has a 50% failure rate after two years. I have met several women that have Interstim and it didn't help their pain. I feel that Matia's treatment is the only way to recover from IC. I know Interstim is not the right choice for me. How would you handle this situation?
To bring food or not to bring food - that is the question.
I'm SO glad you brought up this first question. This has always been a big debate for me! -- to eat before or to bring food there. When I eat before, I feel like I stick out and it causes more attention/questions surrounding why I'm not eating. But when I bring food, that can also elicit attention/questions, plus I feel like a first-grader bringing my pre-made food in my little lunch bag w/ tupperwares. So either way, I feel like I stick out. And I can't say "I have allergies" or other excuses that quickly deflect attention b/c my friends & others know I've been sick.
As for handling the Interstim woman, when she raves about how great she feels, maybe just give a quick, "That's wonderful that you're feeling so well" or "There's nothing like getting your health back" (which generates less conflicting internal emotions than if you said, "I'm so happy for you" b/c maybe you aren't - LOL) ... then immediately change the conversation, literally bring up a totally separate topic (or better yet a direct question she has to answer).
i think Lisa has a good way
i think Lisa has a good way of handling the interstim part.
I always bring my own food. Sometimes I will ask what is being made a head of time so that I might possibly make my food to be almost the same people will not know. Otherwise I just say I have food allergies and it's really no bother and I change the subject. I only have to do this around new people most people now who know me don't even ask me and It doesn't bother me as much as it used to. Remember your healing your whole body and your food is a part of this so dont be sadened by your limited diet it's not forever.
Food
I have a Bible study, and we need to bring food to it, I just tell people I have health issues and I need to follow a special diet, most people do not ask any more questions. Also, saying I have allergies works well..because I do! IC is way to hard to explain to most people..As far as the interstim, I just read an old blog of Matia's talking about this. She was saying to respect other peoples treatment options because part of having IC is learning to trust your decisions. She was saying how having IC makes you loose trust in your body and its so important to believe what you are doing it right. She was saying that is why we should keep our talk about treatment limited unless people really want to know and just be encouraging with whatever path someone else is choosing. I love Nicole's advice, to just say, "Wow, I am so glad you are feeling better" and then change the subject..or get up to go to the bathroom:) In a year or two, she will be coming to you for advice if this device stops working.