The following blog request touched me deeply and I want to answer this first. I will post the request and follow with an answer:
"Request"
Dear Dr. Matia,
I've missed hearing from you. In all honesty, not for just "information" but for that human connection that used to fill the pages of this site; that incredible sense of not only knowledge, but warmth and caring that gave me the courage to take that huge leap of faith and find my way to your clinic. It has saddened me that this site has become so quiet -not just by you, but by patients finding their way to private Face Book pages.
It never entered my head that you might fear that you were redundant. I think that redundancy, not only in information, but especially in words of encouragement, is not only comforting to children, but to those who are ill and scared.
It will be my hope to hear more from you; the incredible human being and the doctor that I know in my heart that you are. I would also imagine that for those that are patients of your husband, the same thing might also hold true.
Denise
Answer:
First of all, I want to repeat how deeply this has touched me. And, I want to say that I too have missed this. But, my restraining myself in posting this more "human" type posts was intentional. Many sad things have happened behind the scenes and it has changed the way I have felt about practicing in a profound way. Sadly I have become much more careful about what I say and have felt that people want more clinical and less human. It is really wonderful to know that this is not true for everyone, as I feel that the human condition has as much to do with becoming well as any treatment. The second thing I would like to say, is it made me very sad that it seemed everyone just disappeared off of this site. I didnt understand why that happened until recently, when I really understood that people have been primarily focusing on a private facebook group.
While it is so wonderful that those people (and I do not know who any of you are) have found a place to share information and and feelings, it excludes those who are not a part of that, lessens the visibility and "presence" of this site for both current people who are not included in that site as well as new people to find, and tremendously minimizes the community here. I know that was not anyone's intention, but that is what has happened I believe. Because so many people were not here and were there, I have felt that people were not really focused on me or this site. So, it has made me feel more and more that posting here was unimportant.
For me, doing this work was something that life brought to me without choice. It began as my own journey of survival and evolved into a journey of changing the lives of other human beings. In my young life I was never of the intention to become any kind of medical practitioner. This just happened and I am ever grateful for the opportunity to have traveled upon this path. But, in addition to the medical aspect of what drives me to do this work, the non-medical part of me-the part of me that existed before ever thinking about medicine or earning my Ph.D.-that part is what drives me to do what I do. Touching other people is what motivates and interests me as much as the medicine. And perhaps that is why Chinese medicine made so much sense to me because it embraces every aspect of the human being-the physiological and the emotional and how that person fits into the picture of the universe itself.
All of this and the litigious climate of medicine today have both played a part in me pulling back from sharing the kinds of posts to which you are referring Denise. I am so touched to know that it has been missed. I am going to make an effort to bring that part of what I do back for those that feel saddened by it's absence.
Life is full of such incredible wonder, not the least of which is the impact of being "touched" by another human being.
Dr.M
Comments
Your posts have definitely
I have definitely missed you and your blogs I find your posts and the forum on here so helpful to read through especially when I feel discouraged, and I only come to this website for information so this is really, really appreciated. Thank you so much, Matia!
Claudine :)
This blog is so precious
This blog is so precious to me that I shudder to think it wouldn't have happened without Denise's message. Thank you so much Denise. Your candid sharing, Dr M, affects me deeply. I am so sorry sad happenings and diverted attentions have affected this invaluable forum and,mostly, have caused you challenges and unhappiness. The changes have become evident over this last while and, not knowing the reason has been a concern, but I put it down to better dealing with more patients and maybe have more time with your growing family.. It breaks my heart to think you have to deal with negativity in the midst of such treasured, positive work. So, conflicting feelings (of delight that you have shared this with the despair you found it necessar)y are filling my heart. I know I join this grateful group of wonderful women in giving daily thanks for having found you. Looking forward to whatever you feel moved to share on this complex, wonder-filled, wholistic, healing journey, Lois
"There is a crack in everything; that's how the light gets in" )
Leonard Cohen)
I too have missed your blog
I too have missed your blog posts. I really enjoying hearing your thoughts on all matters, not just IC related ones. I think you should be able to voice your opinion or thoughts on things with out fear of litigation. The personal side of treatment has ment so much to me. Your the one Dr. who I can speak with and not be made to feel foolish or ignorant in my thoughts. Try voicing an opion to a regular MD and they basically roll their eyes at you because they feel you are an fool because you read it on the internet! Please keep posting and sharing, your thoughts and wisdom are so important for all of us!
Christine
As I sit in a quiet break
As I sit in a quiet break room by myself at work, I decided to hop on to see what is going on in the world! Your post has me in tears. I have felt so lost and alone for so long and cling to this community for support and words of wisdom. I unfortunately have a few things outside the box, so many don't have much in ways to offer me suggestions, but just to have a place to vent or a listening ear brings me comfort. You have always been there for me through so many difficult times when so many specialists have pushed me aside. My husband is always giving me a hard time for checking your page reading old posts from you or old and current patients. Your posts have most definitely been missed! I am here always eager to read and learn, so keep the posts coming!
It's so sad that you have not
It's so sad that you have not felt able to connect with us due to society's expectations. This has sadly happened in so many areas of life - the world has gone mad! Politics unfortunately rears its head in all walks of life - and it's usually those who shout loudest who we hear. I own a day care centre. We have an 'outstanding' rating, and all the children are happy, but it only takes one parent who has had a bad day to wreck my confidence, even though every single other parent is extremely happy, we only hear from the one who isn't. I think it's true to say that most of us are desperate for the human touch, and not the clinical. I have not been on this site for a while because I was BETTER! I would not have been had you not helped me, and I was busy living my life to the full. The clinical touch didn't help me, but you saying "it's going to be OK, it will get better" really did! Your blogs about emotion have kept me going over the last few weeks. I am part of the Facebook group - it's called 'Fans of Dr Brizman'!!!
What on earth could have
What on earth could have happened to change how you feel about your practice so profoundly? It troubles me to know that some things have happened that are that upsetting. Even through my intense frustration with how this process has gone for me, I am always saying,"Dr Brizman says this.." or "My dr doesn't see it that way, she..." I even have 2 friends who often ask, "What does Dr Brizman think about (x,y,z)?" Clearly, your input is a huge part of my life and something I depend on for support and validation. I can only speak for myself but I am sure there are many other people feeling that same way.
I often wonder how you can juggle all of us and your family! I can barely stand myself sometimes (lol)- this disease has robbed me of my serenity far too many times and I am sometimes needy and dependent, yet- you are always there with an email which in itself is a human touch.
There are very few people that I know who truly have a vocation as a career and you are one of them so keep blogging and be redundant if need be, I for one, appreciate it.
Like Christina, this post has
Like Christina, this post has me in tears right now. Thank you for sharing this. I am so grateful for you and the work that you do and hope that you will continue to share your human side and experiences with us, as I agree that it is such a profound part of healing to connect to other people's stories and journies. I have often wondered why the "tone" of your posts shifted a couple of years ago - and I am truly sorry if something bad happened that made you feel like you needed to pull back. At the same time, I understand the need for boundaries, as your job requires you to give so much to so many.
I will make an effort to use the forum more, as I think it is such a valueable piece of this community and am sad that it is under-utilized at the moment. The facebook group is great because it is such an immediate way to connect with so many other patients but the lasting value of the archived conversations that happen here is so important for all patients to be able to access at any time. The forum has been a HUGE lifeline for me, especially lately.
I can't thank you enough for all that you do. And thank you for sharing this deeply personal side of the work with us. It means so much.
Claire B
Hi Dr. Brizman
Hi Dr. Brizman
Your post has brought me to tears as well (and we both know that is hard to do LOL!). It is rare that I am speachless but I feel that way now. Utterly. I honestly think I would be in a dark hole if it were'nt for you and by extention, this website. It was through my desperate midnight searches that I found your amazing work. It was through this website and the brave people who have and do post here.
I had a sinking feeling that the Facebook pages would inadvertently draw us away from this site because we are by nature, impatient creatures and like near instant gratification. I too think we are losing an important record by keeping everything on the Facebook page so I too will make an effort to post here. As for your blog, when I was diagnosed with IC I read your entire blog in about 3 days. To this day I often feel like my 8 year old daughter that loves to re-read her Harry Potter books. I find myself re-reading your blog posts often for information, hope, and truly, for sustinance.
As I type this my bladder feels pretty darn good, and I am confident it will continue to improve, as will the rest of my health. I am beyond grateful to you and your family for what you have done for me and my family. Words will never, ever do it justice. My life has been profoundly altered by IC, but also in turn, by you. Please keep blogging! Thank You!
If we don't excel at health, the only other option is disease.
Dear Dr. Matia,
Dear Dr. Matia,
I think that you know that over the years you have earned such tremendous respect from me; and yes, I just plain adore you for your humanity. (I do hate the fact that you were graciously "right" that I had to give up my beer and pot ) It means the world to me that you took the time to tell us a bit of your story - and that you let me know that my words touched you. As you can clearly see from all these posts, you have touched all of our lives in such an incredible way. So, if you were standing in front of me, proper or not, I would give you a most heartfelt hug.
Such heartfelt words here, I
Such heartfelt words here, I'm so glad I checked in and read this. I am unaware of the Facebook page and I agree it's sad that that has pulled many away from the support we all find here. I have been quiet with my own posts simply because of my continued struggle to get well and my fear of upsetting or discouraging others who may think my story means their journey won't be different. But I still come to get support and, most of all, to gain your knowlege and insight which I so value and have come to have faith in picking me up when I am low. With kind regards, Samantha
What a breakthrough this has
What a breakthrough this has been! I am so glad that this has all transpired! Dr. Matia I always just assumed that you were so overworked with the limited blog posts and the newer email policy. It is so wonderful to hear that this is not that cause, but truly saddened that you've been restrained due to this crazy litigious society :( It makes me sick that a wonderful, honest and caring soul like yourself has to be burdened with such matters. I too will make a commitment to re-engage in the ICAMA site. I didn't fully understand the ramifications until now. Thank you for sharing your heart! I am eternally grateful for it and looking forward to continued enlightenment, healing and heartfelt thoughts.
Claire C
I also meant to add. If there
I also meant to add. If there is anything that any of us can ever do for you, please don't hesitate to ask! If we can lessen your burden somehow, provide feedback, support you in any way - we'd love to help :) For all you have given us it would be an honor to give back.
Claire C.
What a beautiful post - thank
What a beautiful post - thank you Dr M! Such a lovely reminder of how wonderful this community is and I do hope that more is shared on this page :)
Since the time that my IC began nearly two years ago, I have never felt as safe, hopeful and courageous as I have in the past 2 months since beginning my treatment at BomaMed. Thank you for providing that safe plus for us all. IC can be so isolating and it is such a gift to have this wonderful community. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!
Emma.
I too am very touched by this
I too am very touched by this blog. I find it hard to express my emotions verbally, physically and in writing. Its so good that others are so much better at it and I really appreciate reading everybodies comments here.
I don't know why I am like this, I so wish I wasn't but it is something I really struggle with. I just wanted to say that I really appreciate you taking the time to write this blog it has really helped me already.
I also wanted to empathise with Samantha about how I sometimes avoid the forum because I am a 'longer term patient' and I don't want to deter potential new patients from following this path to wellness. Perhaps this is wrong for me to think this and I will make a point of using the forum in future.
Thank you so much Dr B for being there for me over the past 4 years and I am so grateful that I found you, and so fortunate that I have you to guide me to long lasting good health.
Carole
I too am a long time patient
I too am a long time patient and am reluctant to post because I don't want to discourage others who are just getting started. It's so nice to see posts from Carole UK and Flygirl Sam and to know I'm not alone! For me there is a lot of shame associated with not healing in a predicted time frame and not being a great ambassador for your work. Having read your blog over all these years I never think you are being redundant, only reinforcing what we need to know to lead healthy lives. I continue to learn from you and find great comfort in your voice and your humanity. You have never given up on me and have always been encouraging. You have had a tremendous impact on my life and my family's life and I am forever grateful for that.
Carol
Dr. M,
Dr. M,
thank you for this blog. And thank you everybody for their comments. I´m moved to tears and it breaks my heart that some of you had such a great struggle because of the facebook group. I hope we can find a good solution for all of us since both sites are of great value for me.
Dr. M you saved my life. Really! Before I found you I didn´t want to live anymore because my pain was oh so bad and I had no idea where to turn to for help and I just felt like a huge burden to everybody around me. And just because I stumbled over your website and all the great success stories of your former patients and all the motivating and soothing words from your current patients I had my life back within just a few weeks. And that to me is a miracle and I am most thankful for being one of the lucky ones. The diet, your herbs and probiotics, your liability and this community of strong women had the biggest impact on my physical and psychological well-being I´ve ever experienced in my life. I know I still have a ways to go, but most days are good and I have the strength to do what I want and the calmness to enjoy my life, even more than before IC, just because you make me feel so safe. Because of you I can laugh and dance and love again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Annika
just to clarify: with "one of
just to clarify: with "one of the lucky ones" I meant to say one of all the people who are so lucky to have found you
I am so glad you are posting
I am so glad you are posting again!! I LOVE your posts. I learn something from each and every post. It's my connection to you and your incredible expertise and kindness on a daily basis. I may not post all that often but I am certainly reading! I am so upset that something so negative has happened to you. Please know that there are so many who support and stand with you. Probably more than you think. I am going to make an effort to post more too! Such a great forum. Thank you for reviving your posting!
As a newcomer to this site
As a newcomer to this site who will be seeing Dr. Boaz for the first time in April, I must also share how desperately I want the "human touch" of such a place! I have felt so, so ALONE for SO LONG now, and finding this site was the first true glimmer of hope I'd experienced since my IC began. Just reading the introduction/welcome had me in tears, and I've reread the success stories several times now, more tears always streaming down my face. The availability of the forum is also an incredible blessing which I'm sure I will use consistently, and although I may never meet you in person, Dr. M., I feel better just knowing you're there and LOVE reading anything you post. Thank you so much, and please continue!!