What Is On Your Mind?

Facebook iconTwitter iconGoogle icon

Opening the blog today welcoming thoughts from anyone who would like to share.

Dr. M

Comments

btarrh's picture
btarrh

I am a new patient. I feel very blessed for having found this site, and for the treatment. However, I am having a difficult time completely having faith in God that he will see me through this treatment with success. I am trying so hard to be completely confident in this, but I'm struggling. I have always been the person that thinks it won't happen for me...I am not lucky enough. I don't have a problem sticking to the diet and protocol, it's just the emotional piece, which seems very common. I worry, A LOT, and the biggest thing I worry about right now is doing this treatment for years and not getting better. I love reading the success stories on here, and the positives, but there doesn't seem to be much of that anymore, and that scares me. I guess what I'm wanting to know...are there any good tips on things we can do to help the emotional piece of treatment? How do we just let go and put our complete faith into this? This IC journey has been the hardest thing I've ever been through, and most days I want to just give up. I'm so miserable physically and emotionally, it's hard to get through the day like this. I'm hoping that once I start to see progress, my feelings will shift. I appreciate all that you all do! 

Jeannie Burden's picture
Jeannie Burden

Even though I've been in treatment a long time - I saw improvements along the way and my life was pretty good . Before I found icama I ran with every theory I could find & tried to treat myself and saw other practitioners . I spent lots of $ and my mind was always in a turmoil . I have strong faith in God and I believe his son Jesus loves me and paid for my sins. I hope in Christ and reading his word helps me . One day at a time , with someone else in charge now of your condition who are the experts hopefully your worry will ease some . You will get better !  This journey of IC and even life at times is so difficult . 

btarrh's picture
btarrh

Jeannie,

Thank you so much for your response.  You're very right, the IC journey is truly difficult.  Most days, right now, I want to just give up.  I don't know if I have any fight left in me.  There are times of the day where I am completely confident that this will work, then I start feeling bad, and begin to doubt it again, which I'm sure is very common with everyone.  I thank God everyday for my amazing support system, including all of you on this site.  I am trying to take things one day at a time.

drbrizman's picture
drbrizman

Letting go is such an issue for all of us, isnt it? For everything in life really I think. How could you possibly let go without knowing more? I think you just kind of make a decision in life whatever it is about to place on foot in front of the other and walk down a certain path. I also do believe that having faith that you have chosen the right path for you helps. I think having the constant feeling of, "am I doing the right thing" kind of pulls on the ability fro your body to move forward and can even sometimes impede your process. However, having said that, I have certainly had an unbeleivable number of patients feel they would be the only one that has not gotten better and indeed gotten better. Of course there are people we have not helped, and that may be for many reasons. But, I don't think that is the point. I think the point is one has to choose what they feel is right for them-the KIND of treatment and then pour themselves into it. I think sometimes that is a feel thing even more than an intellectual decision, although, it could also be intellectual. Perserveration is a common symptom of GUT imbalance-it is a classically documented correlation in Chinese medical texts. I see this in the clinic all of the time and it is nothing to be ashamed of-simply to recognize. I think today, just try to feel comfortable with your choice, make your steps, and take it day by day. In life, none of us really know what is ahead of us tomorrow-but we act on what we know today and then we wake up tomorrow and see what it brings and act on that. I hope for you, your treatment goes really wonderfully and smoothly. My advice is to ask yourself why you have chosen this and why it makes sense to you, and kind of check in with your body-do those thoughts correlate with a positive feeling inside of you or do they make you feel unsettled. I think the answer lies somewhere in that thought process. I really hope this helped! Thank you for writing.

Dr.M

btarrh's picture
btarrh

Dr. M,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your heartfelt response.  Everyone has been very supportive, and has given great advice.  Sometimes it's easier to follow that advice, and other times it seems impossible.  Deep down I want to believe that this is going to work, I mean what else do I have to hold on to?  As I'm typing this, I have tears streaming down my face...tears of sadness and tears of joy.  I'm hoping to look back on all of this one day as a distant memory. 

Brittany

DLFox123's picture
DLFox123

I so hope that I hit the right tone here.  If I don't please know that I do care.  As time went by and I slowly got better, as much mentally as physically,  I constatnly tried to reassure those that came after me.  I felt such gratitude for those that had done this for me.  Most of the time, for those that I reached out to, their fear and pain turned into a thing of the past - and they slowly, or quickly, regained their lives - many of them long before I did,  So, as time goes by, and they are replaced by others, I don't reach out as often.  I know this doesn't help those in need, and I try to remember this.  The thing is, I know that your fear and pain will also be a thing of the past.  I'm hoping that you can take comfort in the fact that your words and fears aren't new.  They were spoken and felt by both myself and many others - all who now have our lives back.  I say this  not to dimminish how you feel.  For myself, your heartfelt honesty and humanity reminds me of how I am still a small part of the whole.  I thank you for that and hope that you find strength in knowing that those that went before, for the vast part, never regretted the journey that they took and will be forever grateful that they landed here.

Most Sincerely,

Denise

 

btarrh's picture
btarrh

Denise,

Thank you for your response.  I completely understand where you're coming from.  I'm hoping to one day be strong enough to offer advice and comfort to the newcomers.  Sometimes I really need comforting, and other times, I just don't even want to talk about any of it.  I'm grateful for all of you, and this site. 

Brittany

headley.patty@gmail.com's picture
headley.patty@g...

In the beginning of treatment the one and only thing that kept me believing was my faith that God had led me here. Gradually as I spent more time with Boaz and as I started feeling better I could see and there was no more doubt. One very important thing Boaz taught me was to focus on even the smallest improvements. He would continually remind me of the things that HAD improved. I agree to with Matia that it comes down to a decision on your part to stop questioning and fully commit - once I got to that point that in and of itself was like a huge weight taken from my mind. I set small goals for myself. Some days just getting through an hour was a goal. I think the "what ifs" that drive us to the brink of madness can do just that. Listen to your thoughts. Write them down in a journal and then replace them with a positive thought. Like Jeanne I memorized bible verses and recited them when suffering. I know some that put on their favorite song and sing along. I think the key is to drive out the negative thoughts. I have been in treatment a little over a year and I have had wonderful results. I know I am in no way healed but feelng so much stronger, healthier in my body and my mind. I know it is so very difficult especially in the beginning but it has been so worth it for me. I wish the same for you. 

btarrh's picture
btarrh

Patty,

Thank you for your response.  You're very right, I need to focus on the small (good) things.  I try to remember them when I'm not feeling well.  Thank you for sharing your plane story....luckily, I didn't have to go at all on the plane.  I prayed so hard before I went that my bladder would cooperate, and for the most part, it did.  It hasn't been so great since I've been back home, but I'm trying to remember that it's part of healing.  Good luck with your journey!

Brittany

headley.patty@gmail.com's picture
headley.patty@g...

I wanted to share this quick story with you. When I flew to LA for my first appt I had MAJOR anxiety about being close to the bathroom on the plane. I think I got up to pee at least 6 times on a 4 hour flight. I felt like everyone on the plane was glaring at me for using up their bathroom time. At one point they had the lseat belt light on and they would not let you get up. I was in tears and pain. It only lasted about 10 mins but seemed to me like hours. I practically ran over someone to get to the toilet. This past month I flew to Ohio. After I got back home I realized that not once had I even thought about the toilet while in flight. I believe I did get up once but not from urgency. I had no anxiety - in fact almost had even over looked this positive point. Just wanted to add that to the above post. Look for the good and praise it. 

drbrizman's picture
drbrizman

I want to thank each of you for commenting and so deeply and openly reflecting upon and sharing your feelings! It is incredibly helpful to share in this way. For me as a practitioner, it is at the top of my list of things that makes what I do so valuable to me in my own life-that knowledge that this work can make a differecne not only in someone's body, but, in their life and in their soul. There is nothing better!

Dr.M

 

atraylor's picture
atraylor

I would love to know your opinion of colostrum dr Matia. 

drbrizman's picture
drbrizman

While we do not specialize in Lyme, we do believe that infections, Lyme included are best treated through dealing with the methods that we use. Focusing on the system as a whole and the immune system is the most efficient way of addressing these kinds of things. It again is all about balance. So, when asking about something like colostrum, while it may be very useful in certain situations, in others it may prove to be quite problematic and actually impeed improvement. 

Whenever using any supplement it is always about in whom and at what time in the progression of sickness and getting well. I am sure Boaz will go over all of your tests and what is going on with you and help assist you in trying to make the best choices in your particular case.

I hope this helps.

 

cprince's picture
cprince

I just wanted to say this was so refreshing to see. Why I love this site, the positive encouragement when someone needs it the most. I have found myself pulling away from people again as I deal with my own worries and constant walloping life has decided to bring my way. I don't think anyone could believe the string of bad luck that one person can have. I know in my heart that eventually it will turn around and I'm trying to find patience within myself to know something extrodinary is waiting for me at the end of all this.  Brittany with dedication and patience this is a great way to heal. I have stuck to my guns and not let MDs or negative people in my life deter me from sticking to my choice. Stick the course it is so worth it. I started with great anxiety and MDs telling me I was killing myself by doing this treatment. I have not died and surprised MDs actually many times with what has happened through treatment. Some things I choose to keep to myself about what I'm really doing to protect myself, but when I do share with a Dr what I took to eradicate something their is utter disbelief and the response "Thats not possible even antibiotics have a 80% success rate with eradication," or my failing organs returning to more normal functioning organs. It's your choice to be healthy and happy and have a life with less worry. It is possible, wish you and everyone all the best on this journey!